While children who are being bullied feel singled out as the bullying is ongoing, they can take steps that will help them triumph over the bullying actions and their bullies. They can learn how to forget the haters. This requires that survivors learn how to take certain mindsets and actions. It also requires that their families, school and legal officials all be on the same page in stopping bullying.
Forget the Haters: The Effects of Bullying
Children going through bullying feel a range of emotions, from bitterness, fear, anxiety and anger. Their levels of physical and emotional stress rise, sometimes causing physical illness.
These children, who may have had high self esteem, begin to see their self-regard slipping. They may become depressed, according to the Texas State School Safety Center. Bullying’s effects can, if left untreated, last into the survivor’s adulthood. If he is to recover from the bullying he experienced, as well as its effects, he needs to learn how to forget the haters. Most people in the U.S. remember Phoebe Prince, the young girl who hung herself after experiencing ongoing, severe bullying at the hands of several of her classmates.
Forget the Haters: Forms of Bullying
Bullying’s most common definition states that someone is bullied when repeatedly exposed to negative actions from one or more actors. To qualify as “bullying,” the targeted person has to have a hard time defending himself. Also, the bullying actions have to go on for some time, according to OLWEUS’ Bullying Prevention Program. Bullying is an aggressive behavior instigated by someone who imposes his words and actions on another person who doesn’t want them. A power or strength imbalance exists.
The bullied student doesn’t do or say anything to cause the bullying. The bullying student acts on his own initiative, acting out against fellow students he perceives as weaker than he is.
Because bullying has to be a pattern that develops over several weeks or months, does this mean that the bullied student and her parents should wait to be able to establish that pattern? No, according to OLWEUS. The student, parents and school administrators must respond to stop the bullying – as it occurs.
That power imbalance simply means that the bullied student has a hard time defending herself against the student or students carrying out the bullying. If more than one student is engaging in bullying/targeting behavior, she may believe that, as one against many, she has no power to protect herself. She may have few friends or defenders in school or she may be smaller and physically weaker than the aggressor(s). She may also believe that she is weaker emotionally and physically than those who are bullying her.
Anonymity or group exclusion may make her believe she is powerless. When she doesn’t know who has initiated the exclusion or bullying, she can’t defend herself. If another student is sending anonymous notes to her, again, she can’t act to stop it because she doesn’t know who to point out to her teacher or the principal, according to OLWEUS.
Forget the Haters: Emotional Effects of Bullying
The short-term effects of bullying are fairly well-known. These include fear and anxiety. Once the bullying has ended, however, students who have experienced bullying feel the effects long-term.
They may experience long-lasting symptoms of anxiety when they meet new people in college or work situations. If the bullying was severe enough, this could even progress into PTSD, requiring psychological intervention as the survivor works to forget the haters who targeted him in elementary, middle or high school settings.
The bullying survivor experiences lessened self esteem, probably because he blames himself for the bullying and not being able to stop it. Along with the lessened self esteem, he may also develop symptoms of depression, according to the Texas State School Safety Center.
Forget the Haters: What Adults Can Do
Once parents become aware that their child has become a bullying target, they have several avenues of action they can exercise. Their only goal should be to ensure that their child feels listened to, loved and protected, according to Kalamazoo College.
√ Work closely with school administrators, staff and teachers
√ Listen to school officials because their experience can help
√ Listen to their child’s experiences, feelings and thoughts
√ Get outside help for their child so she can begin recovering
√ Encourage their child to report the bullying to her teacher and principal
√ Point out to the child that her bullying classmates won’t change right away
√ If the bullying doesn’t stop, transfer the child to another school – or home school
√ Teach their child to become more assertive
Bullying can be stopped, but it takes many people working together to protect the child and teach the bullying students that bullying is unacceptable.
We suggest you gather a list of forget the haters quotes and show them around to friends and family to inspire more action against bullying effects. Enlist the help of forget the haters quotes in the fight against bullying.